First time this has blogged me.

Well had a long, uncomfortable weekend, seems I am a little closer to the ground and finding it hard to straighten out. I have a condition called Anklyosing Spondylitis(inflammation of the spinal column which leads to total fusion of the spine in a hunched over position). I have recently been diagnosed with sculiosis as well, and have a new curve to deal with. I can`t walk and see forward at the same time any more, but I do walk with the special canes. I`ve slept for the first 2 yrs in my wheelchair because it reclines, and since I can never lay flat again. I now sleep in a specially modified recliner that lays me down from standing into a sitting position to sleep reclined. Now, everything in my apartment is one level with no stairs, hardwood floors and huge, low, wall to wall windows. I can see out from my chair and its on the top of this highrise, which I love. I really need things to enjoy, to love, since there is not much out there for my son and I to win over. The whole place is automated and modified, in ways we can easily reach and grab. My Son is severely retarded, that he is 20 yrs old and has the reasoning of a 5 yrs old. He has a hard time walking and is underdeveloped physicaly, besides all this, we rely on each other. As he does what I physicaly can not, and I am his reasoning, to a certain extent. He suffers from mild autism with varied fascilations and unique, gift like abilities, all are a joy and a blessing . His vision is incredible and his hand strength is that of 2 men. The learning is still everyday, and that is what continues to be an honour. The gift of being a father. We both are on permanent disability and live in a special, love of forgiving each other for breaking promises. I have to sleep now, since I started writing this entry, I have fallen asleep at my desk a dozen times.